Question Submitted: Someone I know is currently in the stage of their pregnancy where she can undergo elective genetic testing and stated to me that they would consider abortion if the child is not perfect to protect the quality of life of their other children. This person does not believe in Christ. What do I do? For now I pray and hold my breath for the results of this testing.
Yes, pray! This may seem like a small thing, but it is the best possible thing to do in these situations. Scripture continually reminds us of the power of our prayers:
“The Lord is far from the wicked, but he hears the prayer of the righteous.” Proverbs 15:29
“The prayer of a righteous person has great power as it is working”. James 5:16
“For the eyes of the Lord are on the righteous, and his ears are open to their prayer.” 1 Peter 3:21
Pray that the Law would convict this woman of her sinful intentions and move her to accept this gift from God regardless of health or ability. Pray for the soul of this child and others like him/her, that our Lord would have mercy on them. And pray for courage and the opportunity to speak the truth in love to this woman.
She has confided in you her fears. She’s afraid of life changing dramatically, both for her born children and herself. Talk to her about this. Ask questions. Is the fear motivated by the fact that life is so very perfect and prosperous right now she can’t stand the thought of anything ruining that? Or is the excuse about not wanting to disrupt her other children’s lives just a front for her real fears? Is there other stress in her life that makes her feel that she couldn’t take on one more challenge? It’s an old cliche, but it’s true: People don’t care how much you know (or what you believe) until they know how much you care. Show her your sincere concern about her family and all her children and she just might be willing to listen to what you have to say.
The fact that Christ is missing from her life explains her way of thinking right now. If I had no certainty of eternal peace after death, and I believed that this world was all there was, I’d run from any sort of hardship (or in this case, even the possibility of hardship), too. My focus would be on living the easy life now, the life focused on me and those closest to me and making sure that we were happy as much as possible. Consider her viewpoint when talking to her.
The answer to how to approach non-Christian friends about abortion was addressed in a previous post, and the same suggestions would apply here. Ask this woman some straightforward questions. What is it that she is carrying in her womb? Does she not see this unborn child as one of her children already? If one of her born children was suddenly disabled would she want to end his/her life so as not to upset their lifestyle? Does someone’s health or abilities change their value as a human being? If the child is perfectly fine and is born into their family and raised with love, would she be comfortable telling him/her later on that she had considered abortion? Why not?